Just…

Or at least it was this last week. And I did pretty good, I think, at this not-job.

I wrote about my j-o-b recently, which I like. The challenge of beach as a “job” is actually not making it feel like a job. And I don’t mean “work,”- I’m not talking about things that one does that take effort, like writing this blog. I made a few boundaries for myself for the trip, one of which was using the positive energy and space away from any formal responsibilities outside of making meals that take an hour or more to prepare, and hoping some topic of interest just popped up. No, by “not feeling like a job” I mean really giving in to the whole vibe, and not making being carefree something that takes conscious work.

So yeah we watched the Barbie movie. And made a lot of references to this line by Ken. I’m “just…” (fill in the blank). As I began to write I was thinking of “just” as an adverb, in which role “just” can have various meanings: recently; exactly or precisely; only or merely; really or absolutely (adds emphasis to a statement); or simply/basically- in this case, being “just beach”, for example. 

All of the uses have a limiting factor. As someone who talks and writes and thinks about “and” so much, “just” brought some stuff up for me.

We talked at one point about all the memories that the house we were staying in likely contained, for both the owner’s family, and many others. We watched families all around us, since there isn’t much on Holden except beach houses, so family time is the whole vibe. I tried to keep my phone out of my hand or pocket, and was mostly successful (mostly– we were making some memories and our family enjoys scrolling our camera roll sometimes as much as the next set of Joneses). I’m glad, and grateful, that one of my main memories was just how pleasant and relaxed the whole vibe was.

Yes, I did also think about “just” as an adjective while beaching it, not basically (“just”) because of the delicious contradiction that it can function as both an adjective and adverb. Or America Ferrera’s monologue in the movie where she lays out the general sitch for every American woman how struggles to “just”… What is “just” came up for many of us because it means “fair” (also rightful or deserved) and let’s be honest, everyone “deserves” a vacation, right? Thank you to every culture out there on the planet that prioritizes time away from work, I hope we’ll catch on here eventually.